Quit Smoking for You and Your Child!

Here are some ideas to up your chances to successfully quit smoking for your health and the health of your children:

1) Consider that your child's health is being effected by the second hand smoke you are exposing them to.  I am a first hand example of this, as I suffer from aasthma and broncitis even though I never haave smoked.  My mother had a pack a day addiction when I was a child.  I am happy to say she has been smoke free for over ten years.

2)Get up and walk after a meal instead of having that cigarette

3) Hold something in your hand like a straw, a pencil or my favorite one of those hard candy sticks.

4) Make sure if you are going out to a restaurant or bar that it is smoke free.

5) Spend more time with your non smoking friends while you are still in the early stages of quitting.

Some Ideas on How to Maneuver the Battle Zone of the Teen Years

Do you find yourself in a constant battle with your teen or tween?  Are these battles leaving your house feeling more like a war zone then a home?  Getting into a power struggle with your child weakens your parental control and just makes for an unhappy living arrangement.  Balancing your need for parental control and your child’s growing need for independence will help you to avoid these power struggles.  Here are some ideas for maintaining this balance:

*Acknowledge your child’s need for independence.  Begin turning over some of the more minor decision making to them.

*Say yes when you can and if you have to say no, explain why.  Listen to your child’s side.  Remember listening doesn’t mean give in.

*Allow your child ways to “rebel”.  Allowing them to assert their independence in certain areas like how to wear their hair, clothes to wear, decorating their room or what music to listen to may make it easier to assert your control in the more important areas. 

*Pick your battles carefully.  Ask yourself if whether getting things done your way is worth the battle that might ensue and remember that sometimes the answer to this question will be yes.

The FYI on West Niles Virus

The Center for Disease Control reported that, as of August 14^th, so far this year 43 states have reported West Nile virus infections in people, birds, or mosquitoes. A total of 693 cases in people:  26 deaths, 406 were classified as neuroinvasive disease (such as meningitis or encephalitis) and 287 (41%) were classified as non-neuroinvasive disease.  This is reported to be the highest number of cases by the second week of August since West Niles was first found in the US in 1999.  Over 80 percent of the cases have been reported from six states (Texas, Mississippi, Louisiana, Oklahoma, South Dakota, and California) and almost half of all cases have been reported from Texas.  That’s the bad news.  The good news is that you can do things to help prevent your family from contracting this disease.

Prevention:  use mosquito repellent when outside, eliminate standing water in your yard, repair window and door screens so those pesky mosquitos don’t get in, and support community based mosquito control.  Community spraying has kept the mosquito population down in my area in Florida and has probably been largely responsible for keeping Florida off the list of highly effected stateseven though we are arguable the mosquito capital of the world.

Symptoms:  If you become infected with West Nile virus, you probably will experience no signs or symptoms.  Most people experience no symptoms. There is a chance (20% of infected population) that you may experience minor symptoms, such as fever, body aches, skin rash, swollen lymph glands, eye pain, fatigue and mild headache. There is still no need for concern.  Mild symptoms of West Nile virus infection generally go away on their own.  However, some people (about 1% of infected population) develop a life-threatening illness that includes inflammation of the brain.  Severe signs and symptoms include a severe headache, disorientation, stiff neck, high fever, muscle jerking, loss of coordination, convulsions, pain, partial paralysis or sudden weakness.  Serious infection may also include infection and inflammation of the membranes surrounding the brain and spinal cord (meningitis), inflammation of the spinal cord (West Nile poliomyelitis) and acute flaccid paralysis.  If you or your children are experiencing any of these symptoms you should seek immediate medical attention. Adults over the age of fifty, and people with weakened immune systems are at greater risk for developing the more serious infection.  So if your child has an autoimmune disorder like my son, they will be at greater risk.  Just be aware and watch for symptoms if they are bitten by a mosquito.   Early medical treatment is key to recovery.

How It Spreads: Typically, West Nile virus spreads to humans via infected mosquitoes. You can't get infected by touching or kissing a person with the virus.  Most West Nile virus infections occur during warm weather, when mosquito populations are active. The period between when you're bitten by an infected mosquito and the appearance of signs and symptoms of the illness ranges from three to 14 days.  There has been reports of possible transmission of the virus from mother to child during pregnancy or breast-feeding, but these have been rare and not conclusively confirmed.  

Glow in the Dark Disposible Diapers?

The latest toddler apparel craze: glow in the dark disposable diapers. What will they think of next?  Spending more money on something that is going to end up in the trash after one use doesn't make much sense to me.  Toddlers and babies are expensive enough without spending this extra money.  I must admit that I did buy the character ones for my daughter one time, but I have a good reason for doing this.  My son picked them out while I was pregnant for his sister as a gift.  His participation in shopping for the baby was part of preparing him for having a new sibling. 

Some suggestions to get the glow in the dark benefit without literally throwing money away:  glow in the dark PJ, glow in the dark shirt, glow in the dark onesie or finger paint plain diaper with glow in the dark paint.  Not sure about whether the finger painting idea will work but it might be a fun activity to try with your toddler.   

Parents and Worrying...Do They Really Go Hand and Hand?

From the time our children are conceived until the time we breath our last breath, parents worry about their children.  It's human nature and perfectly normal to worry about your child's safety.  Many parents would like to protect their children from the evils of the world by sealing them in a bubble so that they never get hurt.  Although this would keep our children save, it does not allow them to live.  Isn't having children live a good life a parent's goal as well.  Many of my friends fear letting their children play outside and keep them in the house all day long.  Think of all the fun you had playing with friends outside and all the fun your child is missing out on staying in the house.  This may be at the bottom of our childhood obesity problem.  I am not suggesting letting your child play outside if it truly is not safe.  If it isn't safe try to find them a safe place to ride their bike, swing, run and swim.  I propose a happy balance between worrying and letting your child live a normal life. 

Susan Jeffer's has a quote that may help parent's work through their fears about their children, "Feel the fear and do it anyway".  She promotes the idea that 90% of the things we worry about never happen and the 10% that does happen we can't effect for the most part anyway so why worry.

The Greatest Gift that You Can Give Your Child...No Matter Their Age

Recently, a choking toddler was saved by some fast acting employees at a MacDonald's in Australia who had been trained in baby and child first aid and CPR.  The parent stood by helplessly pleading for someone to help her child.  Thankfully, this happened in a place where someone was there to help or this may have had a very different outcome.

I wonder why child and baby first aid and CPR are required in order for a teen to receive babysitting certification, but that it is not part of the new parent training that most parents participate in prior to the birth of their child.

I strongly encourage you to take the time and spend the money to get this training and to keep your certification current.  The life of your child or someone else's may depend on it.

Teaching Your Child a Powerful Lesson about Bullying

Thanks Gretchen for this awesome activity!

Sending Your Child Off to College: Final Thoughts

As the day approaches, here are a few tips to help you and your child have a successful college experience.  First and foremost, there is never a time for you to go to your child's classroom.  Your child is an adult and you need to encourage them to fight their own battles if they are having a difficult time with their professor.  This includes them having control over their grades and their attendance.  I am not saying that you should not provide your child with your input on these topics, just that it is their responsibility to take action.

The remainder of the tips are to share with your child. 
*Encourage them to arrive early, especially if they are parking.  Parking seems to be a problem at  
    most campuses. 
*Encourage your child to schedule their classes with their sleep pattern in mind.  Night owls may not
    want to schedule an 8:00 a.m. class.  I learned this one first hand.  Let's just say I missed a lot of
    my 8:00 a.m. class and didn't do well.

*Encourage your child to develop a schedule which includes all the activities that they will be
     participating in each week.  They should include classes, studying, practices/games if they are
     participating in a sport, and down time because like it or not enjoying a social life is a part of
     college life too.

*Encourage your child to find on campus help if they are struggling in a class.  Talk to them about
     doing this sooner rather than later because it is easier to dig your way out of a little hole than a
     bigger one.  Most colleges have tutoring centers, teaching assistance or study groups set up for just
     this purpose.

Swatting: Harmless Prank or Serious Crime

Earlier this week Miley Cyrus was the victim of  a "swatting" prank when police descended upon her home after receiving a 911 call about a home invasion there.   Swatting is an attempt to trick an emergency service into dispatching an emergency response team, preferably a SWAT team.  The caller typically places a 911 call using a spoofed phone number using tech skills to cover their identity. 
Needless to say, these calls are illegal and dangerous. The community is placed in danger as it takes first responders from real emergencies.  Swatters have been tracked down through the cooperative efforts of local, state, and federal agencies.

Warn your children that this is NOT a harmless prank, this is a very serious crime and has seen convicted "swatters" receiving anywhere from 3 to 11 years in prison.

Sending a Child Off to College: Part 4

What should you do if your child begs you to come home and quit college?  The first thing that you need to do, if you receive this call from your college bound child, is listen carefully to their concerns.  Change is hard for all of us and there is no denying that college equates to massive change for our children.  For many of our children listening, reassuring them that their feelings are quite normal and that it's going to get better will be enough.  If this is not enough for your child, fight the urge to rush down to them and solve all their problems for them.  Help them to develop a plan of action for solving whatever problems that they are having.  If they are having academic problems you might suggest that they seek out a tutor to assist them.  If it is a socializing issue, you might steer them towards on campus groups that might interest them.  If it is a roommate issue, direct them toward their Resident Assistant (or whatever they are called this year).  If it is an emotional issue, suggest that they try the college's counseling centers that a majority of colleges have available for students.  If it is a financial issue, help them to develop a budget.  Fight the urge here to provide unlimited funds to them.  In my experience the students who have unlimited funds are the ones who get into the most trouble at college.

In summary, my main advice when you receive this call is to listen and be supportive but fight the urge to solve their problems for them. Don't immediately get in your car to go rescue them from the big bad college.  Some times leaving college is the right answer, it just shouldn't be the first thing that you and your child should try.

Shapewear for Teens: Are There Health Risks?

A growing number of teens, mostly girls, are wearing very tight shapewear all the time to smooth out their bodies.  Teens refer to this shapewear as "Shapies", but Spanx all dressed up is still Spanx.  Is this safe or does it pose a health risk to these teens?  Shapies squeeze the internal organs and can cause ions, and gastrointestinal problems.  Numbness, pain and nerve damage has been reported by teens who wear these shapies all the time.

Psychologists report that these garments may add to the number of teens with eating disorders or poor body image.  I have but one question for these Psychologist, what came first the chicken or the egg.  Could it be that teens with eating disorders and poor body image are more likely to wear shapewear?

Several of the manufacturers of these garments claim that if they are not to tight, there is no problem.  Doesn't wearing loose shapewear kind of defeat the purpose of wearing them at all?

Sending a Child Off to College: Part 3

What would you buy your son or daughter when they go to college?  When starting to get your child ready for their freshman year of college, start with the suggested supply list from the college of your child's choice.  This list is usually included in with their orientation packet.  Here are a few things that you might want to add to this list:

TV (only if your child has the will power to turn it off when they need to study)
Video game player (may help with socialization but again consider your child's willpower)
Small Refrigerator (if dorm allows)
Microwave (if dorm allows)
Recorder to record lectures
Wireless Printer and Extra Ink Cartridges
Noise Cancelling Headphones for those Noisy Dorms
Back-up Alarm Clock
Cell Phone with Paid Plan
Digital Camera
I-Pod with Port (much smaller than a stereo)
Extra Towels (just in case they miss a week of washing)
Comfortable Desk Chair (dorm room chairs are very uncomfortable and we want our children
         comfortable when they study because they may study longer)
Condoms (Yes I went there and you should too!)

 Make sure that your child doesn't take too many clothes, as typically dorm rooms do not have a lot of storage space.  They should include clothes that cover all the weather that they may experience while at school.  If your child is attending a college that experiences four seasons, you may want to make a clothing swap with the changing season to prevent an overcrowded dorm room.

Sending a Child Off to College: Part 2

What is an appropriate gift for your child when they are graduating high school and what is not?  Below is a lists of tried and true gifts to get your grad as they enter a new stage in their life.  There are gifts on this list for all price ranges.

Digital Camera
I-Pad
Updated Laptop
Down Payment for a Car **
Bike
Gift Cards for Places Near or On Campus for Purchasing Gas, Food or Clothes
Noise Cancelling Headphones for those Noisy Dorm Rooms
Luggage
Board Games or Video Game Console and Games
Vacation
Cell Phone with Paid Plan
Small Refrigerator
Furniture
TV
Recorder for Lectures
Printer
I Pod
Watch

**If you are considering getting them a car, I would recommend just making a down payment.  Buying the car for them does not teach the financial lessons that they need to be learning at this stage of life.

Sending a Child Off to College: Part 1

What is not a good reason for selecting a college?  Your child's friends are all going there, you went there, you want them to go there, it's close (or far) from home, it is prestigious or it's a great party school are all bad reasons for your child to choose a college that they will be attending for four years.
What is a good reason for selecting a college?  Start by sitting down with your child and explore their needs, expectations, stregnths and weaknesses in order to determine what type of college is best for them.  Consider the size of the school that will work best for your child.  Some children thrive at a large college where they have lots of choices and other children thrive with the smaller class sizes indicative of a smaller college.  Help your child determine what works best for them.  Remember Ivy League schools meet very few children's needs and graduation from those schools does not guarantee success. 

Visit a college's website, talk to alumni and current students at the various colleges being considered.  Visit several campuses.  Take time to eat a meal in the dining hall, visit the dorm rooms if your child will be staying on campus, note the parking situation if they will be commuting, sit in on a few classes in order to get a sense of student/professor interaction, and observe the student population in various locations around campus. 

Don't be concerned if your child has not picked out a major.  It isn't necessary to pick out a major before choosing a college.  The majority of students change their major several times throughout their college career anyway.   Just be sure to pick a college that has several majors that meets your child's needs and interests.

Don't allow your child to put all their eggs in one basket.  Have them apply to several schools, even if they have their heart set on one school in particular.  This eliminates the heartbreak of having to wait out a semester, if they don't get into the college of their dreams.  Remind your child that many students start out at a community college for the smaller class size or another college altogether while waiting to be accepted by their college of choice.