Thursday, December 9, 2010

How to Fight Back When Your Child Gets the Gimmies

When all you hear from your children during the holidays are the phrases “I want…”, "I have to have" or “Is that all I'm getting”, it is time to take action and fight back against the gimmies. I think the most important gifts that we can give are children in this “Me” society are gratitude and generosity. It is best to start this from an early age because the “gimmies” is a hard habit to break. It is hard to break this habit in a teenager but not impossible. I tried to address this issue in my own children from two directions: volunteering with them to help others and building holiday traditions or experiences.
I began taking my children to help out with the Thanksgiving Dinner for the Homeless that the Salvation Army puts on every year. I started this when my children were nine and twelve. In addition, we volunteered at various Christmas stores for the needy. Check with the organization as to whether they need any help and their age requirements for helping before you go. There is nothing more disappointing than to get there and not be able to help out. These organizations are overrun with volunteers at this time of the year, and are often begging for helping throughout the rest of the year. Consider volunteering at other times of the year, the experience will probably be much more rewarding for your children. I also had my children pick a name from one of the giving trees in the stores at Christmas time. They used their own money, which they earned by doing chores for me, to purchase gifts for these children. They wrapped the gifts and sent them with a special note of holiday cheer. In addition, they began making donations to organizations that the people on their gift list supported instead of getting them a gift. Another thing that our family has committed to is raising money through garage sales, parties and events for charities that are closed to our heart. I think that choosing a charity that holds special meaning to your family really motivates all of you to go out there and do it. There are so many different ways to volunteer, I bet your family will come up with some great ideas that fit the talents and interests of all of you.

Consider giving your children the gift of experiences during the holidays. The gift of your time is what they really want. Some of my fondest memories from my own childhood are not the gifts that were under the tree, but the fun that we had as a family setting up the tree, baking cookies and driving around looking at the lights. I realized just yesterday how important these things are to children when my son (who is in his late twenties) asked me when we were going to drive around and look at the lights.
I think that the best way to fight the “gimmies” is to include your child in the giving process and to provide your child with holiday experiences. Hope that this helps you to have a more joyous, less gimmie-filled holiday season.

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