A Thought Provoking Quote From a TV Show of All Places

"Sometimes the hardest thing to do as a parent is nothing." Words from a TV show I was just watching but definitely food for thought.  Thanks Blue Bloods for showing what a family can be, family values and good work ethic.  The cynic in me believes that we can count on a show like that being cancelled too soon.

Is It Necessary to Pass a Law Giving Parent's Access to Children's Text Messages?

Is it really necessary Arizona to have a proposed law to give parent's access to their own child's text message or should they have that right if they are footing the bill?  Apparently, parents are currently required to obtain a court order to view their child's text messages in Arizona and other states.  I think that the courts are going overboard when it comes to the rights of children.  Parents should have the right to protect their children in the cyber world.  With the increase of cyberbullying, social networking and predators using the cyber world, I see this as a no brainer.  Text messages and postings seem to hold clues as to what your child is thinking or doing.  Often times the news will quote text messages or facebook postings from school shooters or teen suicide victims that clearly indicate their intentions long before the event occurs.  If parents have the ability to keep a closer eye on what their children are doing in cyberspace, some of these tragedies may be avoided. 

Just When You Think Everything Is Under Control For Wedding...SURPRISE

I was just thinking to myself that things seemed to be running smoothly and right on schedule for the wedding in three weeks, when bam the floor dropped out from under me.  Family illness and two unexpected moves scheduled before the wedding have me freaking out again.  In addition to all of this, many people will be staying at my house due to the fact that bike week, spring break and St. Patrick's Day put a kink in anyone getting a room near the wedding location.  Got to love wedding planning.  Thinking of changing my career to party planner, NOT!!!!   If you are planning an event of your own, little piece of advice that I could have used to hear before starting the planning process, check the calendar for conflicting events.

To Vaccinate or Not To Vaccinate and Be Fired

Is it okay for a doctor to "fire" a patient because they choose not to have their child vaccinated?  My answer is yes and no.  I know that seems like a wishy washy answer but it's not.  I think that if a parent is choosing not to vaccinate their child because of their fears about possible side effects, that a doctor has a right to choose to suggest that they need to find a different doctor who shares their views on this topic.  The doctor may believe that it may present a risk to their other patients of exposure to unwanted diseases and that risk is not worth having them as a patient.  The most important thing that I have learned from having a child with a disease is that it is important to trust your doctor because you are basicly entrusting them with your child's health and well-being.  If you have such fundamental differences with a doctor, I ask you why would you want to keep going to them? 

If a parent's decision not to vaccinate is based on a health issue, I do not believe that a doctor should "fire" a patient for their choice.  Whether it is a reaction that their child has had to a previous vaccination. or a GI or allegy problem that has the parent concern, this needs to be discussed with the doctor.  There may be options that the doctor has, to make it safier for the child.

Update on the study that got this debate going in the first place.  There has been no link made between vaccinations and Autism.  The research study that linked these two was found to be falsified and the doctor who conducted the study has lost his license.  Didn't see that splashed all over the news, did you.  This is not to say that there are no risks associated with vaccinating your child, but the American Pediatric Association believes that the benefits far exceed any risks.

If you choose not to have your child vaccinated, I want to let you in on a little secret.  Whenever there is an outbreak in a school, the children that have not been vaccinated will be sent home from school for the duration of the outbreak to ensure that the outbreak doesn't spiral out of control.

Teachable Moment Cyber Style

Use the news story about the two Gainesville High School Students who were expelled from school for posting a youtube video that was offensive as a teachable moment for your children.  Are your children feeling like these girls once did that they can do anything that they want on the internet because they are anonymous or wouldn't get in trouble?  Make sure your child understands that there are consequences to all there actions, even those in cyberland.  Talk to them about the consequences that these two girls and their families are living with.  Include the death threats that the families are receiving.

What Age Is Too Young for a Cell Phone?

While I was shopping yesterday, I past a toddler talking on a cell phone up and I thought "I hope Mom had the sense to lock it before giving it to her little one to play with".  I glanced up to get Mom's attention in order to let her know that it appeared that her little one was actually talking to someone on the phone and noticed that she was talking on her cell phone.  Mom laughed at me and stated that that was her baby's cell phone.  A toddler with a cell phone of her own, really?  When is enough, enough?  I am not sure the exact age a child should have a cell of their own but I am pretty sure that it comes after their ability to identify numbers.  Children in most elementary schools are not allowed to bring phones to school, and will lose them if they are caught with them out of their backpack.  Some divorced parents would argue that they would never hear from their children if they didn't have their own phone.  So the debate is on, when is the appropriate age for a child to have a cell phone of their own?  One thing I think is important to consider is whether your child understands how billing for these phones works.  If they don't you may be in for some outragously expensive phone bills that you are ultimately responsible for.

Does Your Child's Name Really Determine their Future Success?

Can your child's name really effect their success in life?  Recent research indicates that the name you pick for your child really can have a life long effect on their ability to be successful.  Children with unusual names or hard to spell names seem to be less successful then children with names that role off the tongue and are easy to spell.  I am not sure whether this research is valid or not, but I do know that picking a name that is easy to spell will help them learn to write their name quicker.  Maybe this fact alone gives these children the confidence earlier in life to be successful in whatever they choose to do when they are older.  I don't think that anyone would argue that a confident child is a more successful child.

A Touching Response to Hate Graffitti From a Child

I came across a story that touched my heart.  In an article by Barbara Becker entitled "The Swastika in Our Neighborhood", she relates the story of how her eight year old son responded to anti-semitic graffitti that they came across in their neighborhood.  He came up with the idea of covering the swastika with a heart that says "choose peace".  We certainly can learn a valuable lesson about tolerance from him.  Barbara, thank you for your touching story and the hope that you have given us all for a more peaceful world in the future generation.

Going to Do Some Exercising...Take Your Child With You

I have been doing some working out lately to get in shape for the upcoming wedding (just six weeks away).  It got me thinking that many of us put on some pounds during the winter months (our children included) and we start a campaign to take off those pounds around this time of the year.  After all swim suit season is just around the corner. Why not consider getting a workout in with your children.  You don't need to go to the gym to exercise, you could take a walk (or run if you are so inclined to do), dance, play tennis ( you can tell that I live in a southern state), use the wii fit or whatever game unit you have with your child.  Think of it as killing two birds with one stone:  quality time with your child and burning fat at the same time.  Win-win.

I plan on taking my own advice and inviting my son to join me tomorrow while I try to shed some weight.

Politicians and Their Negative Ads...Talk about Bullying

During every TV show our children are watching during campaign season there are negative ads from every candidate.  We are busy trying to teach our children not to bully other children and that is exactly the model that they are being exposed to each time they watch one of those negative campaign ads.  If you don't have a device on your TV that lets you skip those pesky commercials, the bad news is they will be around for another nine months and as the election gets closer they are going to become more vicious.  How do we limit the affect of these ads on our children?   Turn off the TV, read a book together, watch videos, use them as a jump off point for a discussion about bullying and talk to them about what you think about negative campaigning.  We can't make those ads go away but we can certainly do something about there affect on our children

Does Your Child Have the Winter Time Blues or Are They Really S.A.D.?

Is it the winter time blues or Seasonal Affective Disorder that your child is suffering from this winter time?  Seasonal Affective Disorder is not something that some therapist made up.  Your child could be experiencing depression brought on by a lack of sunlight.  During the winter months, the days are shorter and many of our children get up before the sun rises and get out of school shortly before the sun goes down.  These changes in routine cause some chemical changes in all of our bodies that promote the blues and in some cases severe depression.  Some symptoms to be watching for in your child are:  depression, social withdrawal, lack of energy, excessive sleeping,anxiety, appetitie change (craving high carbs), and difficulty concentrating. If these syptoms last for a few days or more, you may want to try some of the treatment ideas listed below to counteract some of the symptoms of this disorder.

Light therapy is an effective treatment for this disorder.  Light boxes can be purchased in many stores.  It provides brighter lights than indoor lights and can simulate sunrise.  Other home remedies include:  eating foods with Tryptophan in them (turkey, milk, egg whites), engaging in regular aerobic exercise, getting outside at lunch time to soak in the sun, and opening the shades or curtains.  If these things do not improve your child's mood, it may be time to see a professional because depression is not something to ignore.  Therapy or antidepressants may be necessary for a time to help your child with this disorder.

They say that there are two sides to every coin, and S.A.D. is no exception to that rule.  There is something called Reverse Seasonal Disorder that affects some individuals in the summertime and is related to obtaining to much sun.  Symptoms include:  persistant elevated mood, hyperactivity, agitation, and rapid speech.  My recommendation for treating this disorder is to reverse the home remedies for S.A.D.

A Parenting "Bucket" List with a Twist

Typically, Bucket lists have been associated with a person dying but this bucket list is about things that you want to do with your children before they are grown up and leave you.  As my daughter's wedding approaches, I am definitely reflecting back on the things that we did with our children when they were young.  I kind of like the idea of writing down a list, maybe even starting that list during your pregnancy.  I think a list like this will help you outline what type of parent you want to be and hold you accountable about how you are fairing as a parent.

Jennifer Lawson "the Bloggess" has created a list that includes activities, visits and art projects.  Her list seems to have attainable activities that you may want to include on your list.  The responses to her post, however are quite different than hers.  Many of the lists that others have posted include things like a safari that are out of reach for most of us.  I encourage you to put a few things on the list that stretch you, but for the most part have items that are attainable for you.  If your children are old enough, ask what they would like to have on the family's bucket list.  By doing this, you may gain some insight into the life and thoughts of your child.