Few things frighten parents more than the task of potty training. Everyone in your life is offering advice about how to go about doing this task, even those who have never actually done it before. Trying to sort through all of this advice, can turn into a daunting task. Rule out the advice that seems too bizarre to believe and try to come up with a plan of action before you begin. At this time I am going to add my two cents to all the advice that you are collecting. I have been involved in potty training seven children: two of my own and five in the school system, so at least I have some experience to draw on.
The first thing that I hope you are considering before undertaking this task, is that your child has begun to show signs that they are ready to be trained. If they are noticing that their diaper is wet and are hiding behind chairs when they are having a bowel movement, they are showing signs of an awareness of these body functions. If they aren’t. I would like you to consider that they are not ready yet. Rushing them into something that they are not ready for will cause them to become frustrated and just give you headaches. I would like to suggest that if your neighbor who is telling you that their child was potty trained by twelve months, that it wasn’t so much that the child was trained but the parent who was trained. In this instance maybe it is not so great to be keeping up with the Joneses.
Some thoughts about potty chairs that stand alone versus potty seats that attach to the toilet. Potty chairs are the right height for little ones to go on their own and many play music or have some built in reinforcer, however they need to be cleaned out. Potty seats do not need to be cleaned since they connect right to the toilet, and prepares child for an easy transition to the toilet itself, however it sit’s a little high for little ones to get on alone.
Whether you choose a method that trains in one day which has you taking your child to the bathroom every half hour to hour in order to catch them ready to go, or whether you choose a method that has your child letting you know when they want to use the toilet, I believe that positive reinforcers are key to making any training much easier. Reinforcers should be something only offered for going to the bathroom, be something that your child really wants and provides immediate gratification. Some possible reinforcers: food, candy, or stickers.
Boys present some additional challenges when training them. They may want to stand like daddy does and often even older boys have trouble hitting the mark. When training my own son, I encouraged him to sit backwards on the toilet by telling him it was like riding a horse. This way it was an easy transition to standing when the time and his height were right. Learn from my experience, be sure to teach your son to point his penis down, unless you are hoping to shower the bathroom with pee. This seems to be a problem for boys no matter what their age. A friend of mine who had a household filled with males, addressed this issue by painting a bull’s eye inside her toilet when she got tired of having to clean up around the toilet. Another friend dropped cheerios in her toilet to help with her son’s aim. I am not so sure about using food in the toilet for young children, as they may reach down and try to eat them.
No matter how you choose to train your child, making sure they’re ready will help eliminate frustration, but there will be setbacks and accidents. Don’t shame or yell at your child over accidents, it will only make things worse. Good luck!
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