Monday, August 20, 2012

Some Ideas on How to Maneuver the Battle Zone of the Teen Years


Do you find yourself in a constant battle with your teen or tween?  Are these battles leaving your house feeling more like a war zone then a home?  Getting into a power struggle with your child weakens your parental control and just makes for an unhappy living arrangement.  Balancing your need for parental control and your child’s growing need for independence will help you to avoid these power struggles.  Here are some ideas for maintaining this balance:

*Acknowledge your child’s need for independence.  Begin turning over some of the more minor decision making to them.

*Say yes when you can and if you have to say no, explain why.  Listen to your child’s side.  Remember listening doesn’t mean give in.

*Allow your child ways to “rebel”.  Allowing them to assert their independence in certain areas like how to wear their hair, clothes to wear, decorating their room or what music to listen to may make it easier to assert your control in the more important areas. 

*Pick your battles carefully.  Ask yourself if whether getting things done your way is worth the battle that might ensue and remember that sometimes the answer to this question will be yes.

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